AGAINST ZIONISM

March 15, 2007 / San Salvador:  Police in El Salvador found Israel’s ambassador to that country drunk, naked, and wrapped in sado-masochistic bondage gear. Source of story.

Tzuriel Refael could not identify himself until police officials extracted a rubber ball from his mouth, at which time he claimed diplomatic promiscuity.

Mr. Refael told authorities he had been abducted by a Russian spy mistress, who led him to a dungeon and outfitted him with handcuffs and leather straps.

To prove he was a victim, he squatted in front of police and expelled a rectal plug, which he claimed was made of compressed pork products.  Police sent the item to an FBI lab in the USA for analysis.

Abe Fucksman of the Anti-Defecation League called the event despicable. “There’s no limit to what anti-Semities will do to vilify Jews,” he said.

Mossad agents conducted a series of arrests beginning at a racquetball court, where they found a suspicious number of rubber balls. They also arrested employees of a dog kennel for having an unusual amount of  dog collars. Finally at an equestrian stable they shot a man for carrying a riding crop.

Mossad also arrested one of its own agents: a female who was observed wearing stiletto heels in her off-duty hours. Their investigation is now focusing on Condoleeza Rice, who is known to use the same equipment.

The Israeli Foreign Ministry called Ambassador Refael home for an administrative spanking. Then they assigned him to a new position as director of Israel’s Land-For-A-Piece program.